Cyber Flotsam

November 13, 2007

How To Remove A Stubborn Lug Nut

Filed under: Humor — Tim @ 1:27 am
Tags: , , ,

Flat TireIf you’re trying to remove a stubborn lug nut, maybe your shotgun will get it loose.

Most reasonable people would not even think to use a shotgun to remove a seized bolt of any kind. Maybe he saw the episode of The Simpsons where Homer was using a gun for all sorts of houshold tasks.

I thought it would be fun to make a list of things you can do with a gun, so you can replace many items with just one useful tool. Some of these you probably already know about, some no so much.

So, here it is, my top 11 list of useful things you didn’t know you could do with a gun:

  1. Open another beer – I say “another” because it’s likely that you have already had a few.
  2. Paper punch, just make sure that if you are punching holes for use in a 3-ring binder you space them properly.
  3. Tire removal, as described in the article.
  4. Releasing air from a tire.
  5. Celebrating, just like they did in the old west, or at least in movies about the old west.
  6. Signaling the start of a race.
  7. Adding ventilation to the soffit of a house.
  8. Fixing a leaky faucet.
  9. Aerating your lawn. There is a potential safety issue here – make sure you have your utility lines marked before you do this. A shotgun with large pellet size would probably work best.
  10. Harvesting apples.
  11. Getting a cat out of a tree.

I feel it is my responsibility in this world where people don’t know that coffee is hot before they pour it into their laps that I am not responsible for anything you do with this list. Actually, it’s probably best if you don’t read it at all.

If you have any uses for guns, other than their intended purpose, share and enjoy!

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